Charming Efforts of Worth

This past week I made time to go through my studio shelves … shelves of works-in-process as well as my shelves of materials and supplies. Things were organized and tidied. Over the weekend I was compelled to use some of my new materials, yet chose to do so while leveraging some of the works-in-process, as well as some older works to breathe new life into them. Know what I mean? I settled on creating note cards because I needed some and I figured it would keep me working small while trying my hand at products I've never used before. You know, a way to control potential waste.

It was fun. I made some hot messes that no one will ever see as well as some cards that actually delighted me. I even made use of some of my spouse's little works that had been hanging around. As a result of this effort I have some new note cards that I'm listing in my ArtFire shop as well as some two-dimensional experience with new materials that I'll be expanding on in the weeks to come … to add some three-dimensional delight to my work. That's the plan, anyway. And plans change in my world.

I invested time in developing and fine-tuning some healing art workshops, including the creation of some personal Spirit Cards. I'm looking forward to sharing this process with folks in my community! I also revamped a three-day heART workshop into a one-day workshop and am working on another one-day heART workshop penciled in for May.

Today I'm making time for bills and paperwork, tax-ish half-efforts, and listing some new items. I have three new non-fiction books to read and new things to learn to nurture this charmed life of mine. Charm takes effort and dedication. And collaboration. And lots of LoVe. And it's worth it.

That's what I made. Peace.

Compliant Collaboration

These past two weeks have been a bit of an experiment. Or a series of experiments. But whatever the label, my trials are guiding me to new realms of realization and utility.

For so many years I've allowed so much of my life to be "scheduled" by external forces. I like to think that I made those choices from a place of compassion, but that's another story all together. As I've mentioned before, too many times perhaps, "I have my life back," and I bounded into it, like a sprinter across the starting line … like the "girl" I once was … only to realize that  … "it" doesn't work like it used to.

But what is "it?"

And there's The Rub.

The Rub I've been getting to know these past couple of weeks. We're not intimate yet, but here's where The Rub has led me:

Yesterday, after consulting with The Rub (an intuitive conversation, for those wondering), I took my ToDo list and prioritized it, as is my habit. But rather than scheduling every item (as I typically do), she invited me to work the list and document my actions in the schedule portion of my planner as I accomplished them.

I didn't understand this guidance, it made no sense, and was ~ in fact ~ counter-intuitive to me. At one point I muttered out loud to my guidance, "you're rubbin' me up the wrong way," which (at the risk of sounding flakey) resulted in shared laughter. All the same, I went to bed setting the intention that some clarity by morning would be my incentive to continue this seemingly silly exercise.

I woke this morning to a whisper … "know your Crone's pace." And I understood. This experiment will allow me to discover, acknowledge, honor and adapt to a pace that is suited to me in my current state of evolution. Damn. That Rub, she's a brilliant wench. And today I join her in compliant collaboration.

That's what I'm making today.

Space for Center

Yesterday, the first day of February, Imbolc ~ as beautiful and gentle as the start may have been ~ transformed into a day that challenged me. 

Deeply.

In a way that surprised me.

And in a way that awakened me.

And challenged again.

After several months of not feeling a need to be vigilant in the daily management of negative energies, it would seem that I'd become … vulnerable to toxic verve.

I found myself feeling irritated over things that simply didn't matter to me.

I found myself taking external behaviors and expressions personally.

I found myself distracted, unfocused and out of balance as the day evolved.

In recognizing these things I found mySelf pressing the pause button.

The button is still engaged as I explore what I own in this scenario. I know it's easier and socially acceptable (and, dare I say, encouraged) in such situations, to blame the external catalyst, and carry that heavy condition with us to our graves. Yet, I'm choosing to own my response to the situation, the challenge. After all, I chose to feel irritation, to take things personal, and to allow myself to be derailed. For surely by owning my responses and feelings, by holding them close, no matter how uncomfortable it may be, I'll become so intimate with these bits of me that I'll be able to honor them and accept the gifts that they offer me. With gratitude. And I will be lighter for it. Plus, there's journaling involved.

It's a rather ominous experience, exploring this realm. All the same, it is a realm very familiar to me and it will be even more familiar before the day is out. Of this I am certain. 

I realize this expression may not mean anything to anyone but me, but … there it is. And I feel more centered for it. 

All the same, I invite you to push the pause button the next time you're knocked off your center. 

Peace.